All Cops are Dicks

All Cops Are Dicks
All cops are Dicks Mutha' fuck each one
Pull out my 9 It's gonna be a bloodbath when I'm done
All cops are dicks bust a cap in the head
The only good cop is one filled with mutha fucking lead

Hugh G. Rection Cop killin' machine
smoking much pork with my M-16
Wanted by the feds so the pigs try to stop me
A .357 in the head wouldn't drop me
I mack and jack a whacked cop attack
Pop a cap in you back with the nine that I pack
Your family's cold mourning, It's no wonder
I'm on top and you're 6 feet under
I'll kill the whole force that shit wouldn't phase me
Get in my face you'll pushin' up daisies
You pussy cop sympathizers think that I'm sick
I'll tell you straight up G - All Cops Are Dicks

All Cops Are Dicks
All cops are Dicks Mutha' fuck each one
Pull out my 9 It's gonna be a bloodbath when I'm done
All cops are dicks bust a cap in the head
The only good cop is one filled with mutha fucking lead

Fucking punk ass pigs think they're above the law
They got probable cause to grab a musta' fucker balls
But me, I ain't no fucker to harass
I'll pop a cap in your doughnut eatin' ass
Cause I'm the violent member of this drunken gang
You know I ain't happy unless inflicting pain
On a pig or a bitch pig I don't need a reason
Wear a badge and blue uniform,it's one season
And speakin' of the bitch pigs, yeah I showed 'em
Made 'em bow down and lick my fuckin' scrotum
When I got bored, popped a cap in the bitch
I'll kill a bitch pig in a second - All Cops Are Dicks

All Cops Are Dicks
All cops are Dicks Mutha' fuck each one
Pull out my 9 It's gonna be a bloodbath when I'm done
All cops are dicks bust a cap in the head
The only good cop is one filled with mutha fucking lead

Two in the morning pig's pull me over
Pigs see my ride and know I never drive sober
Up walk the DUI Task Force dork
So I pull out my nine and smoke some pork
Cause tome a pig ain't no authority figure
Just a target for my nine to aim and pull the trigger
Blue lightin', ticket writin', donut biting pricks
I'll tell you straight up G - All Cops Are Dicks!

He's Only 13 and He's got Herpes

He went down to Stewart Ave.
$20 bill in hand
he was gonna get his first piece of puss
that was his only plan
he met a real nice girl
with a pimp by the name of Earl
they went to the hourly motel room
just a few blocks away
he didn't bring no protection
but they did it anyway
and he dropped a bunch of cash
he fucked some infected gash

he's only 13 and he's got herpes
his dick is so full of sores
it looks like beef jerky
but I guess he'll keep living
with the gift that keeps on giving

Hit me With Your Wet Twat

You've got a real tough nookie
with a long history
of taking giant cocks
like the one on me
before I put another notch
on my dipstick case
you better make sure
you take my load on your face
hit me with your wet twat
fire away!

Swim Dick

When I take a piss
and it's cold outside
something happens to my dick
the head of my penis wants
to craawl inside
and my balls
they constrict
the same thing happens
every time I take a dip
that hateful condition
known as swim dick

When I take a piss
in the public bathroom
and there's wiennie watchers around
I can't get the piss
out the head of my dick
when the stage fright comes down
I hate it when a bunch of queers
are staring at my dick
that hateful condition
known as swim dick

F.U.B.

Fat nasty fucking rank ho
see her every show
taking up the whole row
hanging with the bimbos
fronting like a groupie
a blimp in a mini skirt
her ass all fat and droopy

Cellulite tits
face like Herman Munster
full of more shit
than a garbage dumpster
F.U.b. F.U.B. F.U.B. F.U.B.
giant flabby ass
fucking putrid smell
got more blubber than a harpooned whale
so fucking fat you make me sick
you fucking fat ugly bitch

stretch marks stretching
across her bloated beer gut
see the spandex ripple
on her cellulite butt
even a hard up
blue balled bestialitist sodomist
wouldn't want to fuck
that skank ho hippopotamous

ce like Herman Munster
full of more shit
than a garbage dumpster
F.U.b. F.U.B. F.U.B. F.U.B.
giant flabby ass
fucking putrid smell
got more blubber than a harpooned whale
so fucking fat you make me sick
you fucking fat ugly bitch

fat nasty fucking rank ho
see her every show taking up the whole row
ass like an elephant
face like a gorrila
after 3 cases of Miller
I still ain't drunk enough to drill her
beauty is only skin deep
what's on the inside counts
somebody better fucking turn
her ugly ass inside out
cuz I ain't no fucking spastic
pimping on a fat chick
and if you think I would
you can suck my fat dick

Jack Shack Girl

I've got this new ho
with a strange occupation
she works at the jack shack
inciting masturbation
she tries to front and tell me
that it's lingerie modeling
but I know it's just a cover
for some genitalia fondeling
So i walk into the shack
all strung out on crack
with my gland in my hand
getting ready to wack
I sit down in the corner
my eyes are focused on her
I watch her strip buck naked
as I stroke my big boner

She'll wack your dong
for a $50 fee
Then she brings all her money to me
she's my jack shack girl

Well every Friday night
when I'm out pimping hos
you can find her at the jack shack
shedding her clothes
for some filthy old perverts
chocking on their chicken
they was sticking their dick into
her fuzzy lap flounder
or between her slobber knockers
because her tits are bigger than a pair
of burger king whoppers
with her big ol' juicy butt
and her silicone breasts
one look will make your dick harder
than a bullet proof vest

So wack your dong
and drop your goo
in 20 minutes your session is through
she's my jack shack girl

I buy my drugs
from the money she's making
I'm getting rich
from orgasms she's faking
she'll wack your dong
for a $50 fee
then she brings all her money to me
she's my jack shack girl

I love you for your pussy

Of all the things about you I adore
one thing above all others
I cherish more
yes it's true
I love you...
for your pussy

Of akll the things about you
I hold so dear
it's that velvety smooth pickle parlor
adjacent to your rear
yes it's true
I love you...
For your Pussy

Sometimes you give me my way
let drive your Hershey highway
plant my pole in your poop shooter
or between your succulent hooters
but the thing that keeps me interested
and coming back for more
is your tuna melt
yes your beaver pelt
that delicious tasty tuna taco

Oh Ma Cherie
My love for thee
runs as deep as your chasm
where I squirt my orgasm
yes it's true
I love you...
For your pussy

If you Want To Take A Shit With Ease

If you want to take a shit with ease
putyour elbows on your knees
give your sides a gentle squeeze
and out it squirts like rotten cheese
But when you're constipated
your colon's all clogged up
take an enema
and squirt it straight up your butt
to loosen up all that fecal mortor
and all that brown bowel cheese
and out it squirts like
dirty brown dishwater
that's what you gotta do
if you want to shit with ease

if your bowels are about to explode
nowhere around can be found a comode
just find a spot off to the side of the road
squat down and launch a lumpy linger log load
but when you shit in the woods you gotta remember
nowhere around can be found a roll of 2 ply tail timber
so when the smell starts to linger
and there's no leaves on the trees
you gotta wipe your ass with your finger
That's what you gotta do
if you want to shit with ease

Weekend in Tijuana

The donkey show was excellant
I had a lot of fun
I drank too much tequila
and it gave me the runs

Weekend in Tijuana I got Diarrhea
weekend in Tijuana revenge of Montezuma

The border patrol arrested me
because I got too drunk
they searched my car and found
20 Mexicans in the trunk

Weekend in Tijuana I got Diarrhea
weekend in Tijuana revenge of Montezuma

Roll Out the Barrel(of Farts)

Last night for dinner I had chili and beans
I'll eat more tacos than a man ever seen
give me chimichangas
give me nachos supreme
the farts will smell worse than you could ever dream

I like taco salad with sour cream
I like my chili loaded with beans
the room will stink up
and cause a scene
as the customers flee
and the waitresses scream

Mystery Emission

Would it be a dump
or would it be a fart
if only I had fucking known
from the very start
I thought that I would be brave
and take a fucking chance
now I've got the lumpy brown gravy in my pants
who could have foretold
my unfortunate doom
as I stood there with pants sagging
stinking up the room
I should have known better
but in my drunk condition
how could I predict
My mystery emission

Thick Cheezy Discharge

On my peter she was feeding, her pussy seemed redeeming, so I had to stick it in
Though I'd known her I became a dick donor because she never rejected and organ
With a big juicy butt and a silicon chest but her pussy seemed kind of rank
We all know this girl took enough loads to start her own sperm bank

Thick Cheezy Discharge
Burning on urination
Thick Cheezy Discharge
Velveta ejaculation

There was fire in the hole and pain unfortold when I shot that first milk shake
I had some disease and it looked like nacho cheese and I had that bitch to thank When down to the clinic when I couldn't stand another minute and I had to relieve the pain
They gave me shot and told me what I got but I couldn't pronounce the name

Thick Cheezy Discharge
Burning on urination
Thick Cheezy Discharge
Velveta ejaculation

Now there's something wrong with my tool and I don't know what it is
Before I ever poked that hoe I should have been expecting this
Hole was so infested a condom couldn't save me
Now every time I Piss I shoot out lumpy gravy

Thick Cheezy Discharge
Burning on urination
Thick Cheezy Discharge
Velveta ejaculation

I Was I Was A Dog

I wish I was a dog, so I could like my balls
Then I wouldn't need to leave the house at all
I wish I was a dog, so I could like my nuts
And go around the neighborhood sniffing girls buts

I Wish I Was A Dog

I wish I was a tampon up inside a stripper
Cause then I'd get the pussy and I wouldn't have to tip her
Sounds a great idea and the only thing to spoil it
Is when she pulled me out and flushed me down the toilet

I Wish I Was A Dog

Waking Up in A Pool of Vomit and Dirty Needles

Captain crack for breakfast, washed down with mushroom tea
Drink my morning 12 pack, noon hit of LSD
I start fucking chicks and dusting cops to pass the boring day
I don't remember what I did last night, but every morning starts this way

When I wake Up in Vomit and Dirty Needles
Excrement the stench
With the drugs I got from the money I stole
Then I killed the wench

I broke into the hardware store to grab a tube of glue
Sniffing on the gasoline fumes, shit myself and puke
Start fucking chicks and dusting cops, just like yesterday
Don't remember what I did last night, but every morning starts this way

When I wake Up in Vomit and Dirty Needles
Excrement the stench
With the drugs I got from the money I stole
Then I killed the wench

Pruning the Bush

Eating pussy ain't a hobby
It's a way of life to me
Every method or technique
I've got down to a tee
69 of pussy dine
Is my kind of foreplay
If the pussy's to god damn hairy
This is what I say

Prune your bush
Prune and Trim
This ain't the 1970's
And hairy bush ain't in
Prune your bush
Or pluck it all
Trim that fuckin' bushbeast
Or shave it completely bald

I love to dine on hair pie
Every time before I screw it
Sometimes that muff's so god damn rough
That I can't get through it
I'll lick and eat that pussy meat
Just before I nail her
But if holes a beaver stoll
This is what I tell her

Prune your bush
Prune and Trim
This ain't the 1970's
And hairy bush ain't in
Prune your bush
Or pluck it all
Trim that fuckin' bushbeast
Or shave it completely bald

Mohawk muff can be good stuff
If it's not too hairy
As you see I like 'em shaved
Big muffs unnecessary
Pluck that mound or trim around
Bikini Wax or maybe
Get some nair to thin that hair
Or buy an Epilady

Prune your bush
Prune and Trim
This ain't the 1970's
And hairy bush ain't in
Prune your bush
Or pluck it all
Trim that fuckin' bushbeast
Or shave it completely bald

Big Stinky Pussies

Tuna taco, bearded clam
Sushi bar, hairy ham
Hair Aquarium, Flounder fry
Whisker biscuit, trout pot pie

If it smells like fish it's a dish
If it smells like cologne leave it alone

Big Stinky Pussies - what a treat
Big Stinky Pussies - fun to eat
Big Stinky Pussies - shoot 'em full of skeet
If I don't get some I'll beat my meat

Proud to Be Hetero

I'm not the type you'd call politically correct
I own guns, use drugs, and I don't suck dick
I don't sniff any balls or take the root of the rear
I poke a lot of young sluts and drink a lot of cold beer

Have unprotected sex with multiple teenage hoes
Tell them anything to get them out of their cloths
I use a lot of women but one thing you better know
It's not politically correct - I'm Proud to Be Hetero

I've been accused of misogyny but I love women
Especially when I'm stick my penis up in them
I don't think of all women as just sexual objects
Most of them are amusement more than marriage prospects

I ain't no fag basher but then I ain't no faggot
The peter I don't puff it and the fudge I don't pack it
I enjoy using drugs I don't just say no
It's politically incorrect, I'm Proud to Be Hetero

It was the Tits

It Was the Tits - that made me do the stupid shit I did
It Was the Tits - that made me blow my cash to get that bitch to strip
It Was the Tits - that made me broke from all those table dances
It Was the Tits - that made me drop my cash so she's shake those huge implants

I always was a man that could control a situation
Even when around big tits, there were no complications
I'd scope the tits and drool a bit and though my dick got hard
I always had a firm grip on my cash and credit card

Until this big tit babe made he way upon the stage
The bouncing of those gunboats left my hormones in a rage
When she popped open her bra - I could not believe the size
Those mega massive mammories cold had me hypnotized

It Was the Tits
It Was the Tits
It Was the Tits
It Was the Tits

Those tits they were humongous and called for closer inspection
I had my shit together till she aimed 'em my direction
As I watched those hooter jiggle I tried to retain composure
Refrain from pulling out my wallet for a cash foreclosure

When I Saw those tits my dick erected like a crane
The blood that filled my dick had all drained out of my brain
Those tits had me mesmerized and whacked right out my skull
I was helpless like a zombie and she had complete control

It Was the Tits
It Was the Tits
It Was the Tits
It Was the Tits

It Was the Tits - that made me do the stupid shit I did
It Was the Tits - that made me blow my cash to get that bitch to strip
It Was the Tits - that made me broke from all those table dances
It Was the Tits - that made me drop my cash so she's shake those huge implants

Drugs and Crime Made Me What I Am Today

On drugs and crime let me tell you what the facts is
I'm gettin' rich cause I don't payin' taxes
I got hoes and they're out there selling ass
I peddle coke, speed and grass

Drugs and Crime Made Me What I am Today

I carjack, sell pills and smack
When the cops ain't lookin' I shoot 'em in the back
Got hoes run rackets and games
Got the whole neighborhood hooked on cocaine

Drugs and Crime Made Me What I am Today

I don't care what the lawdogs say
From what I know crime it does pay
Don't do the crime if you can't do the time
But I'm rollin' so fuck that slogan

Safe Sex Don't Stop Crabs

A sexual faux pas with a fucked up whore
Was a one way ticket to the drugs store
The bitch at the counter was a friend of my brother
And to my family was revealed my blunder

Stick to tapes and porno mags
Safe Sex Don't Stop Crabs
Stick to tapes and porno mags
Safe Sex Don't Stop Crabs

Who did I see outside in front
It was my hoe bitching of an itching in her cunt
She started to yell - we got in a fight
Thus was revealed where I'd been last night

Stick to tapes and porno mags
Safe Sex Don't Stop Crabs
Stick to tapes and porno mags
Safe Sex Don't Stop Crabs

Everytime you fool around you roll the dice
If it's not Clymidia or Aids - it's pubic lice
Babby come back - you can blame it all on me...

And she said no
Now my balls still itch and I lost my hoe
Now it's all over what did I get
The itching unwelcome geninitialia pet

Stick to tapes and porno mags
Safe Sex Don't Stop Crabs
Stick to tapes and porno mags
Safe Sex Don't Stop Crabs

Everytime you fool around you roll the dice
If it's not Clymidia or Aids - it's pubic lice

Last Man in the Gang Bang

It's a marvelous night for a gang bang
All the band are ready to go
We got our Trojans and our 12 Packs
Gonna run a train on some groupie hoe

Ram her - ream her
Triple team her in the back seat of my beamer
Poke her - stroke her
So much meat down her throat it will choke her

It's a marvelous night for a gang bang
We got ourselves a hot teenage slut
It's a glorious night for a sperm bath
Gonna glaze down her face like a crispy cream doughnut

Ram her - ream her
Fill her buns up with our wiener
Erectin' - injecting
Glaze the hoe from every direction

Standing in line - stokin' my dong
Watchin' this bitch getting drilled - all night long
My turns up - that pussy smells like rotten shrimp
I lost my nerve - my dick went limp

I was the last man - IN THE GANGBANG
I was the last man - IN THE GANGBANG
I was the last man - IN THE GANGBANG
I was the last man - IN THE GANGBANG

She spread her thighs - they were covered with cum
Pussy swollen as a baboons ass - looked like chewed bubble gum
Was it the smell - or was it the beer
There just went my porno career baby

I was the last man - IN THE GANGBANG
I was the last man - IN THE GANGBANG
I was the last man - IN THE GANGBANG
I was the last man - IN THE GANGBANG

Wrong Side of the Glory Hole

Sitting at home bored as fuck
Heard of this place where I could get my dick sucked
It all happened when you went in the stall
Pulled your dick out and stuck it through the wall

When it stated sucking it was just as I feared
It wasn't no bitch - this thing had a beard
Wrong Side of the Glory Hole
Wrong Side of the Glory Hole

Nuclear Beer Fart

Drank a six pack at the nuclear plant
Now I green goo in the seat of my pants
Blasted out my butt, singed the hiar upon my nuts
I aimed my ass and passed the gas at all the drunken sluts

Amy anus is leaking the smell is reeking
Nuclear Beer Fart, Nuclear Beer Fart
Float one by and all my friends die
Nuclear Beer Fart, Nuclear Beer Fart

It's a simple equation: Farts = Fun

Mongoloids

Billy Joe Jimmy Jack fucked his sister Bubba Sue Elly Mae
To prove to cousin coondog and uncle Cleatus that he was not gay
Now they got a problem they just can't seem to avoid
Bubba Sue Elly Mae is pregnant with a Mongoloid

Mongoloid, Mongoloid with a case on Down's Syndrome
Mongoloid, Mongoloid with an extra chromosome
Mongoloid Mongoloid from generations of being inbred
Nothin' but a Mongoloid with a waterhead

Well Billy Joe jimmy jack and cousin coondog got out the Hoover vacuum cleaner
and placed the nozzle up inside the hole where billyjoe had placed his wiener
they held Buba Sue down on the bed with some help from uncle cletus
turned that vacuum cleaner on and sucked out that fetus

Mongoloid, Mongoloid with a case on Down's Syndrome
Mongoloid, Mongoloid with an extra chromosome
Mongoloid Mongoloid from generations of being inbred
Nothin' but a Mongoloid with a waterhead

Well the fetus was aborted and the hounddogs came up to sniff it
As they sat around eating all the afterbirth they decided what to do with it
They listened to the brilliant idea of their incestuous uncle cletus
Had a redneck hillbilly hoe-down and bar-b-qued the fetus

Mongoloid, Mongoloid with a case on Down's Syndrome
Mongoloid, Mongoloid with an extra chromosome
Mongoloid Mongoloid from generations of being inbred
Nothin' but a Mongoloid with a waterhead

My Back Always Hurts Because My dick Is So Heavy

I've got a strange deformaty in shape and in size
I've got a third leg down between my thighs
Not the kind of leg that you walk on it's got a head instead of feet
And it's a 20lb slab of solid man meat

When the chicks see how big it is they all want to bed me
And my back always hurts because my dick is so heavy

My giant trouser snake tends to make my back ache
But the women love to suck on my tremendous tube steak
I can deal with all the pain as long as all the hoes
Drop down on all fours and drink my gooy loads

Shooting so much goobitches will have to build a levee
And my back always hurts because my dick is so heavy

Crusty Panties

Crusty Panties
Moist and clammy
On juicy teenage hoes
Pussy boogers
Sweet as sugar
Pure as the driven snow
Polka dot t backs
Floss that ass crack
Such sweet teenage allure
Juicy wet puss
And tender fur bush
That feels like crushed velour

I'd never sacrifice a virgin
Before I'd get a taste
All perverts know a virgin
Is a terrible thing to waste
Soiled polka dot panties
Crotch all damp and smelly
Delicious teenage panty jelly
I love those teenage girls
With crusty panties

Crusty panties
Pervert candy
Sweet panty fruit
In prime cotton lining
Delcious dining
Not to lick would be a crime
Crotch all sweet and juicy
pussy dining is a must
But who would ever want to eat
Pie without the crust

I ain't no pedophile
But those 16 year old hos
Bone me up in seconds
When they shed their clothes
Down to those crusty panties
I got a fetish for young chicks
With crusty panties

Skinny waist
Young juicy ass
Perky teenage mammeries
16 or 17 years old
No pussy could be sweeter
To lick and suck and eat her
I love those teenage chicks with crusty panties

Domino Stacking Butt-Fuck Buddies

All those cheesy boy bands that think they're cool
But behind closed doors they pack each other's stool
They strip buck necked and form a single file line
And they stick their tweezer dicks up each other's behinds

Domino stacking butt fuck buddies
Stick their pole in the hole that's muddy
Pack each other's fudge like silly putty
Domino stacking butt fuck buddies

They try to act like studs to hide their gayness
Then they shove their wierners up each other's anus
They take their inch wormsand aim a straight trajectory
Through their buddiy's dingleberries into their fudge factories

Domino stacking butt fuck buddies
Stick their pole in the hole that's muddy
Pack each other's fudge like silly putty
Domino stacking butt fuck buddies

Stool stuffing, peter puffing
Rump ranging, queers

Bake,Wack,Eat Sleep

Bake wack eat sleep
bake wack eat repeat

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