This one goes back a few years to around 1993, when some very strange things happened to me...
I was living in Norcross, GA with my girlfriend at the time. She had gone out of town to visit family, and I was out of town playing some gigs. When I arrived home I could not find our 3 cats anywhere. I phoned my girlfriend and she said they were outside when she left. I looked around outside for a while more and still couldn't find them, so I called our leasing office. They told me that they had called Animal Control to have them picked up for being outside too long. I got in my truck to go spring our cats out of kitty jail in Lawrenceville.
When I arrived at the animal pound; the total fee was something like $85 for all three cats ($85 was a lot of money in 1993), so I paid the money and they released the cats, but not before they gave me a citation for more money with a court date for leaving cats outside. I tried to explain that I did not leave them outside, my girlfriend had done it, but they wrote me the ticket anyway, and I left with our cats. When my girlfriend got back in town, I told her what had happened and showed her the citation. She said she would take care of it. A few months later we split up.
So several months after that I was fucking this other chick. One of our favorite pastimes was playing games of hide the salami while all dosed out on LSD. So, one night I went to pick her up and I had 2 hits of acid on me for the evening. The plan was to go back to my house, trip, and fuck all night. While I was at her house in Stone Mountain I had the brilliant idea of, "Well let's take these doses now and then by the time we get back to my house they ought to just be starting to work on us."
So we took the acid and started driving back to Norcross. On the way home a cop car got up behind me. My tag was a few weeks expired so he pulled me over. I got out of the car handed him my license. I was calm, the acid hadn't started to take hold yet, and I was sure I'd be moving on within a short period of time. Well, the cop comes back to the car and explains that there was a warrant for Failure to Appear because my ex-girlfriend had not paid the kitty citation. He let the girl I was with drive my truck off and cuffed me and put me in the back of his car for the bench warrant. I was driven to the police station on Jimmy Carter Rd., where I guess the idea was to transfer me to a different vehicle and take me to county jail. They took me out of the back of the car and put me straight in the back of another cop car that was already running. I was just now starting to feel the first effects of the LSD.
In the back of the second car was the biggest, sweatyest black dude I had ever seen in my life handcuffed and thrashing around in the back seat. He kept rocking back and forth, squirming around, and screaming, "I don't care who's dick I have to suck just let me out of here." While all of this is going on two cops are standing outside the car with the front door open, chatting away. One of the cops (a female) gets in the car and starts to drive away. We go about ten feet and the other cop she was talking to runs up and knocks on the window and she gets out of the car again. Next thing I know the two cops are all over each other, making out and shit - meanwhile I'm sitting in the back of this car with a 400 lb. sweaty black dude yelling about sucking dick and sweating all over me, and now the acid is really kicking in...I can't believe it. After about 20 minutes she gets in the car again starts to drive away and the cop runs up again the same thing happens. They're making out, I'm tripping (they don't know this), and the dude is still spazzing out yelling about sucking dick and sweating. She gets back in the car again and starts to drive away and for a third time the same thing happens. Man, shit like this only happens when you are on acid.
Finally after about and hour of this happening she gets in the car and drives to jail. I get to jail and somehow make it through the intake process without anybody knowing I'm tripping, which takes four or five hours. By that time my friends are already at the jail with the money it takes to get me out and just as my trip is trailing off I am released. Me and the girl go back to my house, fuck, and call it a night. Shit like this only happens when you're tripping...
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